Also in my inbox...an e-mail to Rally for Domestic Partnership benefits for UMD employees!
You can read the e-mail in the following...
Organized by the Pride Alliance. [I think Pride's the wrong cardinal sin for this group. Doesn't sodomy fall under Lust?] ------------------ Currently Domestic Partnership benefits are NOT provided to UMD employees. [Every time I read this, I think "currently" is modifying "domestic" instead of "are not provided."] They do not receive health insurance, tuition remission, or survivors benefits like those currently offered to spouses. [What about roommates? What about roommates that one might even sodomize? Do you actually have to live in the same space to be domestic partners? Could someone get benefits for their longterm girlfriend, even if they didn't live in the same apartment? Could someone get benefits for their short term girlfriend? Could a teacher start co-habitating with a student, and the student get free tuition?] If the University cannot attract the highest quality researchers/faculty it decreases in prestige. [Because all of the highest quality researchers are engaged in domestic partnerships nowadays.] This means students do not receive the highest quality education possible. [Not that the highest quality researchers/faculty ever actually interact with actual students.] Come show your support for President Mote's Proposal. [It's a Motest Proposal.] Make a difference, make a change! [Make a difference! Make pocket change for a salary once they have to rearrange the budget to pay benefits to lifelong roommates!] YOU ARE INVITED— COME RALLY FOR YOUR CAUSE WITH [Aagh! They're screaming at me!] Senator Raskin, Senator Madeleno, Delegate Mizeur, Delegate Pena-Melnyk, Doug Duncan, Elbridge James, [Who?] and even more supporters at the Rally to Support President Mote's Domestic Partnership Proposal October 11th, 2007 at 4:00pm Nyumburu Amphitheater In 1994, the University of Maryland's University Senate voted by a large margin in favor of domestic partner benefits; [Uhm...if the entire state is apparently behind this plan, then why do we need a rally to support it?] yet despite repeated attempts to move forward, [or backwards, depending on which way you're standing] off campus forces have prevented implementation. [Off campus "forces?" Like Navy SEALS? Gravity? God, perhaps? Or maybe they just mean democracy-in-action. Maybe tax-payers don't want to fork over money so a state institution can spend it on things they don't believe in. Could they be a little more specific...and a little less intimidating?] On April 16, 2007 President Mote submitted a proposal to Chancellor Kirwan. [We have a Chancellor? Sweet!] The proposal requests that the University of Maryland, College Park be permitted to use existing funds to implement Domestic Partnership Benefits. [Because I'm sure there is nothing else we could spend that money on...like fair wages for graduate students...or beefing up security to stop serial rapists.] The Pride Alliance understands that government agencies are reviewing the President's proposal, yet it is far past time to move forward on Domestic Partnership Benefits. [I didn't realize there was a time table for these things.] We are urging Governor O'Malley, Chancellor Kirwan, and the Board of Regents to make President Mote's proposal a reality. [Did he only imagine that he proposed it? Couldn't we just type it up and print it out...then it would be a real proposal. He should us glossy paper.] The Pride Alliance invites you to attend our rally and show your support for Domestic Partnership Benefits. [How come I never get invitations from Terps-for-Life over the University listserv?] Confirmed Speakers: Dr. Phil Nash (Asian American Studies Dept.) Delegate Mizuer (MD District 20) Delegate Pena-Melnyk (MD District 21) Senator Raskin (MD District 20) Senator Madaleno (MD District 18) Pat Wojahn & Dave Kolesar (Plantiffs in MD Marriage Court Case) Doug Duncan (Former Montgomery County Executive, VP of Academic Affairs UMD) Elbridge James (President of Progressive MD, Former President of NAACP MD) [Even after they identify them, I still have no idea who the speakers are...]
For more information, please contact VP.Pride@umd.edu or 301.405.0755
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