The Ark and The Dove

Free Oatmeal and Canned Goods

If anyone needs some emergency rations, feel free to stop by my apartment any time over the next thirty two hours. In the course of the move, I've thrown out everything that expired or lacked a date stamp, and I still have enough food to last me until December 2010.

The first five people at my door get an exclusive "Banned by Isabel" piece of Peter Terp apparel!

Unfortunately, I am now out of the rare and valuable 2001 Swiss Miss edition cocoa.

Scribbles, the Writing Spider

On the topic of strange and unusual life forms, check out the arachnid that was greeting me in my front door at my new home.

I don't usually kill bugs directly, if I can avoid it. I'm glad I spared this particular spider, however, because it is apparently called a writing spider (aside from the bright yellow markings, writing spiders are known for their elaborate, zig-zag stabilizing threads running down the middle of their web).

My hope is that it will somehow become irradiated and bite me in my sleep, thus granting me uncommon, super-human powers of literacy so I can start getting my research published. (Any other spider powers seem like they would just be a distraction.)

College Park Menagerie

In the last twenty four hours, I have been stared down by what must have been the world's largest muskrat and a two foot long rough green snake (he at least seemed two feet long at the time). Actually, the muskrat didn't really stare me down. He was impressively disinterested in the fairly steady stream of traffic between us and only got dodgy when he noticed me staring at him. But he was still really big and just kind of hanging out on the curb above Guilford Run like it was nobody's business.

The snake gave Isabel quite a startle (I wish I had my camera at the time). He did performed quite the balancing act for us, though, as he scaled a wall to make his rather dilatory getaway.
Anyway, it's kind of creeping me out that all this wildlife is suddenly starting to stir in these end days of my time here...

Could You Marry an Alien?

With the recent buzz on the anniversary of Humanae Vitae and claims by a moonwalker that aliens are real, it seemed a natural enough question to pop in my head: could a human being marry an alien in the Catholic Church?

My conjecture is that it entirely depends on the reproductive capacity of the alien species, and that it would be entirely based on the possibility of hybridization. That is, the primary determining factor in whether or not the Catholic Church would allow different species to intermingle would be whether a union between the married couple could generate new life. If there was a possibility of natural cross-fertilization, then it is possible that we are genetically linked to that species (a la Star Trek's creation myth).

If there were no possibility for reproduction, then I would assume the Church would argue that no valid marriage could be consummated.  Species that reproduce in a solely asexual manner would probably be right out as well. The trickiest part from the realm or morality might be if the species were genetically compatible, but not anatomically compatible. For instance, there are plenty of organisms on this planet that mate without engaging in what humans would consider a recognizable act of reproduction. If the alien's anatomy did not quite match up, would it force the human to engage in an illicit act. What happens if a species has more than two genders, or some kind of host-parasite relationship would be anybody's guess.

The Church would probably be considered perverse and intrusive for considering these matters and declaring certain inter-special relationships illicit. Some Xenosexual organization would probably rise up and claim that marriage should be the union between any two sentient organisms. The Church would be labelled some kind of galactic hate group and undergo vast interstellar persecution. The pope would have to go underground. become the leader of a ragtag band of cultural space rebels, and transmit encyclicals via a secret and remote broadcast station nestled in an uncharted nebula.

Actually, the future of Catholicism is looking pretty cool...

Final Fantasy or Guilt Fantasy

According to Yahoo News (and I'm sure Jonathan Swift grins a little in his grave whenever someone types that), the old Playstation 2 consoles are responsible in part for slave labor and political turmoil in Rwanda. Apparently, there is a rare metal that Sony needs for its systems, causing significant (whatever that can be classified as) abuse of labor when it ramped up production of the console at the turn of the century. Read more here.

Capitalism, Not Racism

Thomas Sowell has a provocative column on the mortgage crisis. He argues that the depiction of lenders as cutthroat and predatory misses two important elements of the problem: 1) the lenders are at risk as much as the borrowers, and 2) the government essentially pressured lenders to find ways to give loans to high-risk borrowers as a means of addressing what the media depicted as racism. That is, as Sowell claims, when the media recognized that a smaller percentage blacks were given loans than whites, they cried foul and inspired politicians to nudge lenders...even though the lenders were being hedgy on the basis of financial risk, not skin color.
Or, as I would put it, we were better off when lenders only saw one color: green.

Fur-real

Via Drudge...

Animal rights activists are petitioning the pope to stop wearing fur.

Wasn't that one of the articles in Luther's 95 Theses?

For the Aesthetes...

I stumbled upon the Web Gallery of Art today.

It's actually a pretty cool Website that lets you hunt down a European artist from 1100-1850 and look at an online portfolio of his or her work. It's a pretty handy resource for browsing through Renaissance religious art. Now, all they have to do is construct a 3D museum space running off of a Quake engine...

Oh, the Humanity!

I came across a link to a video depicting an angry woman mutilating an item from her boyfriend's action figure collection. She claims it was to teach him a lesson for going to Las Vegas with his friends and for not buying her a ring.

Incidentally, the figure she destroys appears to be a Sideshow Biker Scout, which has a retail value of $799.99. Most of his collection appears to be high-end newer stuff.

Something tells me it isn't going to work out between the two of them.

Congrats, Albertus and Therese!

In honor of A&T's recent nuptials, I cut and paste an excerpt from my favorite book of the Old Testament, Tobit:

At this point Tobiah, mindful of Raphael's instructions, took the fish's liver and heart from the bag which he had with him, and placed them on the embers for the incense.

The demon, repelled by the odor of the fish, fled into Upper Egypt; Raphael pursued him there and bound him hand and foot. Then Raphael returned immediately.

When the girl's parents left the bedroom and closed the door behind them, Tobiah arose from bed and said to his wife, "My love, get up. Let us pray and beg our Lord to have mercy on us and to grant us deliverance."

 

She got up, and they started to pray and beg that deliverance might be theirs. He began with these words: "Blessed are you, O God of our fathers; praised be your name forever and ever. Let the heavens and all your creation praise you forever.

 

You made Adam and you gave him his wife Eve to be his help and support; and from these two the human race descended. You said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; let us make him a partner like himself.' 

Now, Lord, you know that I take this wife of mine not because of lust, but for a noble purpose. Call down your mercy on me and on her, and allow us to live together to a happy old age."

 

They said together, "Amen, amen," 

and went to bed for the night. But Raguel got up and summoned his servants. With him they went out to dig a grave,

 

for he said, "I must do this, because if Tobiah should die, we would be subjected to ridicule and insult." 

When they had finished digging the grave, Raguel went back into the house and called his wife,

 

saying, "Send one of the maids in to see whether Tobiah is alive or dead, so that if necessary we may bury him without anyone's knowing about it."

There are few scenes in the Bible cooler than Raphael in an nation-sweeping wrestling match with Sarah's demon-lover Asmodeus; and there are few scenes funnier than Raguel digging a grave at night so he can bury Tobiah in secret to avoid the shame of having yet another of his daughter's suitors killed by a demon. If Mel Brooks were looking to make a Biblical comedy, I don't think he could do much better than Tobit.

Anyway, I hope their wedding went as well as Tobiah and Sarah's...and with fewer supernatural entities to overcome (although it did happen near New Orleans, so you never know...)